The Top Ten Reasons NOT to date Aladdin OR Mozenrath!
by Jill Weber
10- When Aladdin is first seen, he's stealing food from the marketplace.
(Translation, you get potluck.)
When Mozenrath is first seen, *he's* stealing
food from the marketplace. (More potluck, *sigh*)
9 - Aladdin does not have a steady income
Neither does Mozenrath
8- Aladdin lives in a depressing hovel
Mozenrath lives in a depressing citadel
7- Aladdin has a smelly pet monkey
Mozenrath has a smelly pet eel
6- Aladdin has a quick temper
Mozenrath has a quick temper
5- Al can't take you to restaurants.
("No shirt, no shoes, no service")
Moze can't take you to parties.
(He never gets invited)
4- Iago
Mamluks
3- Aladdin's always running around trying to save the world.
Mozenrath's always running around trying to
conquer the world.
2- Aladdin's home gets invaded a lot.
(Can you say "Mozenrath?")
Mozenrath's home gets invaded a lot.
(Can you say "Aladdin?")
And the #1 Reason to NOT date Aladdin OR Mozenrath...
1- Your main rival for Aladdin's affection
(Jasmine) owns a flesh eating tiger
Your main rival for Mozenrath's affection
(Mozenrath) owns a flesh eating glove.