Top Ten Reasons NOT to date Sadira OR Jasmine!
by Jill Weber
10- When you first see Sadira, she's stealing food from the marketplace. (Sigh, more potluck.)
Jasmine doesn't steal food in her first scene, but she gets around to it as soon as she makes it to the marketplace.
(Hasn't ANYBODY in Agrabah heard of menus?)
9- Sadira doesn't have a steady income.
Jasmine is rich, but she never remembers her money.
8- Sadira lives in a depressing ruin.
Jasmine lives in such a beautiful palace it will make your place look depressing.
7- Sadira doesn't have a smelly pet (how could Disney have overlooked that?) but her potions are smelly.
Jasmine's pet tiger isn't smelly, but he's bigger than you are.
(Much bigger.)
6- Sadira has a quick temper.
Wow, clean sweep! Jasmine has a quick temper, too!
(And a tiger.)
(Who is much bigger than you are.)
5- Dinner at Sadira's is likely to change you into a timepiece.
Dinner at Jasmine's is likely to try to eat you.
(And so is her tiger.)
(Who is MUCH bigger than you.)
4- The guards are always chasing Sadira.
The guards are always following Jasmine.
3- Sadira spends a lot of time trying to capture Aladdin.
Jasmine spends a lot of time trying to rescue Aladdin.
2- Sadira's home gets invaded a lot. (Can you say Witches of the Sand?)
Jasmine's home gets invaded a lot. (Pick a villain, any villain.)
And the #1 Reason to NOT date Sadira OR Jasmine...
Jasmine has Rajah.
(Who is much bigger than you are.)
Sadira has a Sand Beast.
(Who is much bigger than Rajah!)