A/N: Ok, for those of you who haven't heard the song "Babkak, Omar, Aladdin, Kassim" by Alan Menken (it's a cut song, along with "Call me a Princess"). But basically, those 4 guys are all best friends, (hence, 'blood brothers'.also a term from "B,O,A,K"!). No one really (including me) likes the way "Call Me a Princess" portrays Princess Jasmine, so I decided to make it more of a parody, and have Aladdin's friends sing about any stereotypical princess. Enjoy!
"What?!? You're in love with a girl you spoke to for less than a
minute?"
".But she's so nice, and 'down-to-Earth."
"And you can justify that with, oh yeah! 10 seconds worth of dialogue!" Kassim quipped.
"..and beautiful. So beautiful.." Aladdin looked dreamily off into the sky.
The four 'blood brothers' were hanging around in "their" alley. There was a low table where the four would often perform barbershop quartet numbers, solos, or dance recitals.
"So basically, Al, all you really like about her is the fact that she's gorgeous.."
"You guys just don't understand what love feels like!" Aladdin sighed again. He was still looking off into the distance, a glazed look plastered over his eyes.
"Hello!! Aladdin! Wake up and smell the camels! She's a princess!" Babkak face was right in front of Aladdin's.
"Whoa!" Aladdin fell off the table he was sitting on. "Babkak..."
"Aladdin, you know about as much about love as the rest of us do - Nothing." Omar laughed, "Unless of course, you count Kassim's incident with.."
"OMAR!!" Kassim screamed, and then in a low voice, "Never, ever, EVER mention that incident ever! That is, if you want to live." Kassim cracked a smile.
Babkak looked at the two fighting men. "Guys! We're trying to help Aladdin here! Now Al, why would a fancy, schmancy, snobby princess even possibly love a lazy bum?"
Aladdin looked hurt. "I don't think that's helping Babkak.."
"Of course it's not." Kassim gave Babkak a menacing look. "What he meant to say was that what do you want with a princess?"
Omar, Babkak and Aladdin gave Kassim questioning looks. "Huh?"
Abu, Aladdin's monkey, came scurrying up Aladdin's shoulder. "Hey Abu. You saw this princess character, right?" He shook his head. "Is she really worth Al's time?"
Abu shook his head no. Kassim smiled and looked at Aladdin.
"But, but anything's possible! . .Just, not probable." He sighed, knowing he was defeated. "You're right Babbak, what does a beautiful princess want with a lazy bum anyway when she can marry a handsome prince?" His friends, feeling bad, tried to make him feel better.
"Ya know, I think our friend Aladdin here needs some cheering up! What do you say guys?" Kassim nudged Babkak and Omar.
Babkak, understanding what Kassim was saying smiled. "The sun hasn't set yet.."
"Oh no guys. You are NOT doing a number about me loving a princess.."
"Who said a number about you loving a princess?" Kassim smiled and jumped onto their table. "Give me a key Omar!"
Omar sung out an undecipherable key.
"Nevermind!! Babkak! Throw me that rag!" Kassim caught it and draped it over his head so that his hair was covered, and started to sing..
[Kassim]
Call me a princess, I don't care
Call me obsessed with nails and hair
Only concerned with what to wear
Shallow and so blasé
[some passing Agrabahians stop at the sound of the infamous troupe signing]
Go ahead, call me "royal pain"
I'm unimpressed with your disdain
Let me repeat one sweet refrain
Princesses get their way
Other girls cook, but that's not relaxing
Princesses make reservations
Life's much too short and Lord, it's so taxing
Ruling these darn third world nations!
[People gasp in surprise - soon Babkak jumps onto the table and takes over]
[Babkak]
Some say that when I nag a whine
Nobody's voice is as shrill as mine
Daddy thinks that I sound just fine
He's in my royal sway
Other girls study, why do they bother?
I study how to grease up my father
Fathers were born to pay
And princesses get their way
[Omar hops up and the 3 swirl their rags around, bat their eyelashes at Al, while onlookers laugh]
[Omar]
Call me a princess, I don't mind
Selfish disgrace to womankind
People need hobbies - I unwind
Watching how much I weigh
Other girls work for law degrees
Some scrub the floor on hands and knees
I'd rather have a facial, please
[Babkak]
Slather her face in clay!
[Kassim]
Soon I'll get married - what could be sweeter?
To some Salim or Abdullah [points out at young me]
Whoever he is, the two things he'll need are
Earplugs and plenty of moola! [Babkak plugs his ears]
[Babkak]
Princesses write a check - it clears
That's cause they spend those wonder years
Running to Dad and faking tears
Training him to obey
Fresh outta cash? No problem, I drop a
Snit and go running straight to my papa
[All 3]
Then everything's okay
Princesses get their way
{Believe it}
Princesses get their way!
The three jumped off the table and walked over to Aladdin who was holding out a turban. As the watchers dispersed, some dropped money into the turban.
Aladdin looked up at his friends when the people were gone, and the sun went down.
"..Because you guys know how a princess acts.."
Babkak, Omar, Aladdin, Kassim by Atlanta Enchanted